Monday, November 2, 2015

A Clarification

"And these were Heavenly because
he never saw them clear enough
to satisfy his love, his need
to see them all again, again."

Wendell Berry

of all the human beings in the world,
any of whom could and would disappoint me,
all of whom can and do disappoint me,
you're the one I want
failing me most.

I want you failing me every day,
which is one way of saying
I want you close.
I want our masterpiece
depicting someone kinda like you
only more awesome and less human
vaporized by a kiss with reality,
which is one way of saying
we should kiss more.
If I had my pick
of all the world's crosses to bear
I'd choose you—in my weakest moments
you're the one I want
pinning me to the earth.

All the disappointment so far
has not been enough. I've always prayed
for the chance to be wrong
about you again, again.
I now believe that in this one regard
you'll never be capable
of satisfying me:
You can't fail me enough
to dispel my dogged appetite.
I'm afraid that's another reality

There are kinder
and certainly more effective ways
to say I love you—
but from me, a novice
at loving mortals
to you, a novice
at appearing mortal,
this seems in this blossoming
moment the most eternal.